Below is a thank you that we wanted to share with you because it encapsulates what we are trying to achieve at Partners With Parents.  It is from a family who used us to plan their son’s Bar Mitzvah ceremony. We take great pride in guiding a family through the details of this meaningful rite of passage, from the preparation of family members, to the “feel” of the service, to the music, readings, speeches, and the siddur.  The results are always magical.

Dear Partners with Parents,

I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for my son’s Bar Mitzvah. Planning an event like this is mystifying, especially when trying to meet everyone’s needs and address each age group.  I just can’t tell you how amazing your team was. Your coordinator was so lovely.  She and our ceremony leader helped me with every aspect, from start to finish. The cantorial student you provided fit in perfectly as well.  She, too, was warm and totally tuned into our specific needs.  Every generation and people from all backgrounds felt welcome and included and thoroughly enjoyed the occasion.

The speeches were a huge surprise. Normally, I would be concerned about leaving them “to fate” but I totally trusted the team, especially our tutor who led the service.  She came so well prepared and was so professional in her communication with everyone involved.  Her talk during the service was beautiful.  She totally understands my son and values him the way I do.  She’s like part of our family.  My son’s speech was amazing.  It was funny, on point, and in his own voice.  She promised me good grammar, my one requirement, and she came through!  I had no fear about what would happen on the big day because I so trusted her judgment.

Most important, my son loved this experience, and it was meaningful for HIM. He was so happy to work with his tutor that he now wants to continue his Jewish education because he finds it fun and interesting!

I just have to tell you and anyone else who wants to know, it was a fantastic process and a beautiful result. The service was intimate and memorable, everything my family and I wanted.

Thank you so much,

Linda Bicks

Each student has a different set of conditions under which he performs his best.  Each of us needs to be a scientist, making and testing hypotheses about our ideal study conditions.  Spend a number of weeks experimenting and finding out the answers to the questions below.  Remember what works the best for you is not necessarily what feels the best or most comfortable. The ultimate goal is finding what makes you most effective.

• What room in your apartment is best for homework and studying?

Do you have a dedicated area where you can go when you need to do work?  Are there some types of assignments that you can do in a more public place, like the living room, while some require more seclusion?  If you live in a “zoo,” consider the library.

• What position is best?

Sitting at a desk?  In a comfortable chair?  Lying on the floor?  Do you have access to everything you need?  Do you benefit from getting up and moving around periodically?  Does it vary based on the type of assignment?

• What kinds of noise are distracting?

Music?  Parents talking?  Siblings playing?  All of the above?  Are there places in the apartment/house where you can get away and have comparative silence?  Again, if a Yankee-Red Sox game seems like a quiet retreat, consider finding a place outside your home. (more…)

Now that the new school year has settled into place, we want to remind your entire family about a crucial component of success.  As your children sort through the details that will support their survival through this year (Where’s my locker, again?  Are white shoes totally out this year?), don’t forget to give time and attention to getting enough sleep.  You’ve got to relax; this early in the school year there are comparatively few responsibilities.

In times of stress, we tend to stay up later to “get things done,” we sleep fitfully when we do get to bed, and then we wake up prematurely with that cool burning sense of worry over getting things handled.  It may feel restful to spend time in the simulated unconsciousness of chatting online or staring at the television until late hours, but maximizing your actual sleep hours is critical.  It seems a small thing, but inadequate sleep only adds to one’s level of anxiety and diminishes performance across the board.  Especially with a book-bag full of new syllabi weighing heavily on their shoulders, students need extra rest to handle the stress and stay well both physically and academically.

So, get to bed!

On a recent drive past the urban mega-cemetery where the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway intersects the Long Island Expressway, my five year old exclaimed “Look, a stone forest!”  It was a wondrous, important place in her eyes, and though she had visited graveyards, she had never taken in such a striking panoramic view of one.  Having officiated at several of her own pet funerals in her brief career as a thinking, feeling being, she exhibited a comfortable somberness at the sight.  I could see her lips move slightly as she attempted to count in hushed amazement the innumerable headstones rocketing past our view.  “What are all those stones for, Daddy?” (more…)