Below is a thank you that we wanted to share with you because it encapsulates what we are trying to achieve at Partners With Parents.  It is from a family who used us to plan their son’s Bar Mitzvah ceremony. We take great pride in guiding a family through the details of this meaningful rite of passage, from the preparation of family members, to the “feel” of the service, to the music, readings, speeches, and the siddur.  The results are always magical.

Dear Partners with Parents,

I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for my son’s Bar Mitzvah. Planning an event like this is mystifying, especially when trying to meet everyone’s needs and address each age group.  I just can’t tell you how amazing your team was. Your coordinator was so lovely.  She and our ceremony leader helped me with every aspect, from start to finish. The cantorial student you provided fit in perfectly as well.  She, too, was warm and totally tuned into our specific needs.  Every generation and people from all backgrounds felt welcome and included and thoroughly enjoyed the occasion.

The speeches were a huge surprise. Normally, I would be concerned about leaving them “to fate” but I totally trusted the team, especially our tutor who led the service.  She came so well prepared and was so professional in her communication with everyone involved.  Her talk during the service was beautiful.  She totally understands my son and values him the way I do.  She’s like part of our family.  My son’s speech was amazing.  It was funny, on point, and in his own voice.  She promised me good grammar, my one requirement, and she came through!  I had no fear about what would happen on the big day because I so trusted her judgment.

Most important, my son loved this experience, and it was meaningful for HIM. He was so happy to work with his tutor that he now wants to continue his Jewish education because he finds it fun and interesting!

I just have to tell you and anyone else who wants to know, it was a fantastic process and a beautiful result. The service was intimate and memorable, everything my family and I wanted.

Thank you so much,

Linda Bicks

I am the mother of a 5 and 7 year old. I am a conscientious parent so I am beginning to think about how to teach my children about “community service.” I want my kids to be justice oriented, aware and appreciative of differences, and immersed in the joy of giving. Being Jewish, I want to teach them the mitzvot and help them become active and generous community members, engaged in “repairing the world.”

I know that parents are the most important teachers, whether we like it or not, so it’s on me to pass these values along. But, I will be honest, I bristle at the notion of making up a community service project and “doing it,” rather than living as someone who serves my community.  What I really want to teach my children  is to become people who see being of service as part of their daily lives.   Recently, a neighbor’s experience crystallized things for me. . . (more…)

One of the real perks to living in NYC is being able to give our children access to so many different people and ideas.  While most of the time these interactions flow smoothly with benefits all around, every once in a while there is friction.  Not necessarily so much friction among the children, but rather among parents and the childrearing ideas that we hold dear to our hearts.   For instance, I have discovered that I am a fairly relaxed parent, who tries not to say “no” just for the sake of saying “no.”  I firmly believe that my child should have the chance to experience life through his own interactions and experiments with the world, not mine.  I am the parent that makes others shudder because I allow my son to lick rocks, put sticks in his mouth (indoors no less), and balance precariously on the furniture. (more…)

Each student has a different set of conditions under which he performs his best.  Each of us needs to be a scientist, making and testing hypotheses about our ideal study conditions.  Spend a number of weeks experimenting and finding out the answers to the questions below.  Remember what works the best for you is not necessarily what feels the best or most comfortable. The ultimate goal is finding what makes you most effective.

• What room in your apartment is best for homework and studying?

Do you have a dedicated area where you can go when you need to do work?  Are there some types of assignments that you can do in a more public place, like the living room, while some require more seclusion?  If you live in a “zoo,” consider the library.

• What position is best?

Sitting at a desk?  In a comfortable chair?  Lying on the floor?  Do you have access to everything you need?  Do you benefit from getting up and moving around periodically?  Does it vary based on the type of assignment?

• What kinds of noise are distracting?

Music?  Parents talking?  Siblings playing?  All of the above?  Are there places in the apartment/house where you can get away and have comparative silence?  Again, if a Yankee-Red Sox game seems like a quiet retreat, consider finding a place outside your home. (more…)